by Charlie, Shaylem & Alex
Donald Trump announced today over Twitter that he would be handing out something special for Halloween. That got the hopes up of many American children, but they would soon come to realize that it was not what it seemed. Instead of candy, this Halloween, Donald Trump is handing out something a little more trick than treat. He tweeted, “I’ve got something for American children this Halloween that they won’t forget for the rest of their lives.”
People speculated what it could be, but none guessed its true nature. White House press secretary, Kayleigh McEnany dropped the beans in an official statement:
As the President tweeted today, he’s going to be handing out something special from the White House this Halloween. This thing, though, will not be candy. It will in fact be the Coronavirus. He will stand outside the White House with his mask removed, and sneeze on any interested American citizen. We’re just trying to do our little part to make this Halloween a little bit better.
A White House reporter later questioned Donald Trump on the truthfulness of this reporting (we don’t know why) and the President confirmed the statement’s truthfulness, “It’s gonna be really really great. We’re gonna hand out the best and only the best type of candy. Not candy at all. But that special feeling you get when the fourteen days are over and the infection sets in is something I want to share with my people, the Americans citizens of this American America.”
We wonder how Trump’s decision to hand out the Coronavirus for Halloween is going stop the spread of the virus. But we trust his judgment and hope everyone has a happy and healthy Halloween.